Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Islarme, Religion of Tears II: God Unilingual, A True American

Continuing my thoughts on Islarme, using The Complete Idiot's Guide to The Koran, by authors Sarwar and Torpov, as a provisional guide. I just couldn't take any more of The Complete Idiot's Guide to Understanding Islam.

  • The very first sentence of the book says, "There are many reasons to read the Koran." I agree. One of the biggest reasons applies especially to Jesusianismists: when you read this, you will see right through it. It will be painfully obvious that it's a worthless rag written by a pathetic self- aggrandizer, not by any Supreme Being. Once you've had a good look at it, you can look at your own holy writ with a fresh perspective and hopefully begin the process of freeing yourself from the intellectual and moral straitjacket that is religion.
  • The authors go on to say that "There is one enemy for Muslarmes...fear of the other." Perhaps, but Islarme has a much more formidable enemy: the segment of the world populace who have outgrown superstition and are learning how to apply rational thought in all circumstances, even those that have historically seemed to be in the domain of religion.
  • Historian Michael H. Hart, in his book The 100: A Ranking of the Most Influential Persons in History, declared Smokin' Mo as his number one "most influential person in history." I'll just point out here that the authors present this selection as having happened "not long ago"; they imply 1992. But the book was actually published in 1978, thirty-two years ago, and reprinted with a few revisions in 1992 (Smokin' Mo was not affected by the revision). I know, everyone wants to skew the presentation to favor his own view. I'm not making any accusations, just pointing out the truth. You decide what to do with it. More importantly than this slant, Hart declares Jesus to be more important than Saint Paul, the inventor of Jesusianism. Again, just pointing out the truth.
  • The authors mention "the message that catapulted the Prophet and his movement to prominence". The Idiot book I'm using is just one among a handful that I expect to use for this series. I intend to get into the history of Islarme, so we'll have a chance to see whether it was Smokin' Mo's message or some other force that gave Child-molesting-prophet-ism the high profile it now enjoys. Credit for this non-offensive substitute for the term Mohammedanismistism goes to YouTuber bdf2718. Thanks!
Chapter 1, The Basics
  • I learn something new every day. We start off with a discussion of the opening lines of the Qur'an, which are known as the Basmala, and alternately as the Bismillah. Whoa. I didn't even know that was a real word. Of course I've heard Freddie Mercury sing it a billion times, but I thought it was like Paul McCartney singing "goo-goo-g-joo". Thank Allah for Wikipedia:

  • The Iranian authorities permitted an album of songs by English rock band Queen to be released in Iran in August 2004, partly because the song "Bohemian Rhapsody" contained several exclamations of the word "Bismillah". The group's lead singer, Freddie Mercury, was born in Zanzibar as Farrokh Bulsara to Indian Parsi parents and was proud of his Persian ancestry.
  • I hate to seem ungrateful, but come on guys, 2004? That song has been around since 1975 (it was already 17 years old when Wayne and Garth made it popular again).
  • We go on to read about this preposterous notion that although Allah is greater (this is what "Allahu akbar" means), it's apparently not great enough to give humanity a message that keeps its meaning when translated. I consider that a serious limitation, and a shockingly clear sign that Islarme is crap.
  • "No one deserves to be worshiped except Allah". We'll see. So far, given its linguistic handicap, I'm not impressed.
  • The authors praise Smokin' Mo for lifting the Arabs of his day out of moral decadence. One of their heinous traditions gave them permission to bury an infant daughter alive if the father decided that he didn't want a daughter. How does one die when buried alive? I'll guess suffocation. I agree that this is a brutal practice, and a miserable way to die, but I just have to point out that death by stoning is probably far worse, especially when preceded by a hideous beating.
  • We learn about shirk in this chapter, which is the Mohammedanismist analog to denying poor little Parakletos. Jews and Jesusianismists may wish to disavow Allah, but it sure looks like the same pathetic, infinitely vain desert apparition to me.
  • One of the "points to ponder" considers the Islarmic commands to women about how to dress, from Sura 24, Ayat 31, and the fact that Mohammedanismism doesn't show favoritism to men in this area, because Ayat 30 has some commands for them as well. Let's compare the commands, shall we?

  • For women, Ayat 31: "...tell the believing women to cast down their eyes, guard their chastity, and not show off their beauty...let them cover their breasts (rats!)...and they must not show off their beauty...or their hidden ornaments."

  • For men, Ayat 30: "...tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest."
  • Islarme is obviously a religion of peace and sexual equality.

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